I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
how does that bad decision feel?
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
