And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
