is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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