I'm lost and stupid without you.
Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
