K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
