.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
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