You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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