How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I take back everything I said about communal showers
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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