508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
