Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I need a beard to bite.
I enjoy the company of your penis
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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