Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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