If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
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