Your face is a jimmy john
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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