I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
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