Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
