just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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