piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
that is very illegal...i love you.
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