her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
