Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
Randomize