literally had 100 drinks last night.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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