Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
