she woke up with a sticky ear
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Randomize
