I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
