New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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