I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
