This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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