he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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