Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Pants are for mortals
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
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