But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Randomize
