Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
