Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
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