a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
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