Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
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