What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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