I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I deserve this hangover.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
