Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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