I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
