Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I still have a little drunk in my system
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
