Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
