I don't usually arrange sex via text message
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
