Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
Randomize
