You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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