The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
