please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
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