No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
