can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
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