he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
