i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
