She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Randomize
