she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
